The society of self-love has been a concerning topic for me for a while, seeing that people who’ve been betrayed turn to themselves. What is the meaning behind self-love? Does it mean that love has a way to redirect itself upon the self? When love is given, is it thrown back? When love is thrown out, does it ricochet or bounce off a wall to return to our hands?
I once wrote the words, “Does a lamp or a candle ever turn on or become lit, by itself?” I answered that question with a “no”. However, I also asked the question, “Does a lamp or a candle ever turn off or go out, by itself?” I answered that question with a “yes”. No person can ever light themselves, become alive, without another’s aid. At the same time, though by the opposite sense, a person left alone is a person soon living in darkness. Darkness is loneliness, by the abandonment a lonely person feels.
The two primary human senses are seeing and hearing. Both are necessary to understand beauty. Beauty holds its meaning in this, by way of vulnerability. That is the essence of humanity. All we can see, are things we can connect to. All we can hear, are the same as what one can see. It is the mere perception of life, in movement for sight and sounds for hearing. Silence, in this sense, encompasses sheer darkness.
So long as a person is both capable of seeing and hearing, nothing that one can do was ever attained, as a lesson, by oneself.
Should betrayal be what has caused the person to regress back into themselves, so that they may understand who they are, this is when they neither want to “see” nor “hear” their sight nor words. It is to say that the only thing such a betrayed person may see is their trembling hands or worried expression in the mirror. They may hear only their cries when audible under complete silence of all other sounds. It is at that time that such a suffering person wishes to see or hear something other than the sight or sounds of their pain.
And, should a person ever be offered advice that what one does is perfectly normal, and one says that their acceptance of their actions is self-love, then they are proving my point in the example of sight and hearing. We are not willing to listen to our own hearts, so we take to another’s advice. We do not want to see nor hear what we already know to be too painful. We wish to see another world, in someone else’s heart. Such a discovered truth may be identical. Though, one side may be stronger, and thus, create healing.
Life has no other way to deceive us, other than a person believing they have made a choice of their accord, not through the influence of another.
Life’s deception comes through a false belief that we are “unique” in standing alone, on our own, with only our own strength in what we are now doing. Is it so hard to fathom that others have walked the same road, tread the same path, plodded the same course, and drowned in the same pain? Are we that arrogant to believe that we are unique through our struggles?
When one turns to themselves, after betrayal, one turns themselves inside-out. They then reveal their pain as a physical essence, believing their uniqueness has somehow turned “ugliness” into “beauty”.