Excerpt from an Essay – “The Flesh Sculptor” – The Process of Change is a Selfish One – 3/2/2020

“Truth is the one thing that must come from another, through our placement of trust upon them. Yet, we will desire to understand ourselves, after betrayal. What happens when we betray ourselves, have dealt wounds upon ourselves, and we lack all courage to forgive what we have done? Is not the hardest person to forgive, ourselves? It is that ‘change’ comes from a self-discovery. Upon the arrival of that change, we forget what it means to forgive and to love, because those changes had been physical, not metaphysical. Those changes had been the wounds to carve flesh, turning us into someone who has raised nightmare from a Hell within. A Hell within, that had resulted from an external betrayal. It is now that we know that life is only lived, with another by our side.”

Nightmare is the realm of our subconscious mind, being a place misunderstood about ourselves. We do not, though would like to, know what our beginning tells about ourselves. Would we like to bury it, again? Nightmare, not dream, is an interest by humans to become immortal, by returning to places of old historical wisdom, among other areas kept so subdued in darkness, that it seems only those who could control it, would be today’s consumers. Consumers of information, consumers of text, and the basis of a “nightmare” is the idea that Death is immortal. For it must be, that Death is our true beginning. A way we have these days, an obsession over our identity or appearance, is an obsession over nightmare, the immortal world, and Death.

Subconscious information soon undergoes for the receiver of it, a series of transformations. We do not know where we are in such a darkness. Our only identity seems to be confusion, when we blunder about in the study of something that in daylight, was beyond our understanding. This is to say that rather than walking through Heaven, we are walking through Hell’s territory.

What we raise from Death, or nightmare, or the immortal realm, will be things of ugliness that we will say should be accepted or loved.

Change will always be the element of something pertaining to adaption, not acceptance. That is, everything that has changed creates fear and paranoia. Each change that comes will arrive from seeing ourselves in darkness, and only using the sense of touch to paw at our flesh, to feel what we are blind to.

We become the flesh sculptor, when our eyes are cloaked in darkness. When we do not see the light for improvement, though only the seemingly random changes, that can only be touched.

Touched by hands that sculpt, and there is never an added layer of satisfaction upon ourselves. When love is offered by someone with an external vision, would be the thing to tell us that we are satisfied. Because, as love comes to us in terms of knowing we need not the materialism to make us content, it instead comes to us as a showing of a oneness. As that oneness, love is the emotion that makes us not want for more. For it would be a great insult upon either a man or a woman, when the other beloved might say aloud, “I want more than simply you.”

Love is the emotion that results in satisfaction, if kept pure. If it has become impure, then the emotion that shifted from its presence in the mind, to now a presence in the form. This is to say that lust now governs the desires of a person, and soon, deception and change, too.

When a person says that they love themselves, they may soon state that they are unique, that they are their own person. Though, this is the voice of deception that is stating a person’s own doings are original. It is, as well, to state that the person wants change, resulting from a feeling of dissatisfaction. They are not feeling love, when they want change. They are blind to their deception, and so they have fallen into lust.

When we are the flesh sculptor, we are committing to action upon the feeling of guilt, burying that heavy feeling far below until it cannot be seen. It is because no one, when they act, are in want to see what they’ve done. They do not care about the tears that flow from another person’s face, upon when another person has seen what they’ve done to themselves. They believe themselves strong. Though, they are weak, without the continuous praise from other actors. And, there is no greater act than the deception, itself.

As a flesh sculptor, we change, and never improve. Were we to improve, we would find that satisfaction coming from another. And, what results in any amount of deception, besides the lack of trust? Should a person believe themselves only capable in knowing themselves, then they have embraced the feeling of distrust, and are now entirely deceiving themselves. They deceive themselves, because change can only ever accompany the process of a person attempting to know themselves, by themselves. When a person is alone, made that way because of betrayal, they see themselves in darkness. But, they have embraced it enough to become a flesh sculptor, being a person who only feels, and does not see.

2 thoughts on “Excerpt from an Essay – “The Flesh Sculptor” – The Process of Change is a Selfish One – 3/2/2020”

    1. In fact, I think it’s a very psychological reaction to what we see, as a common sight, in today’s time.

      When science takes over, or rather, back when it took over, and became the current way of thinking, it said to people that God has no realness, that He is dead, or that He is not practical in the way of healing.

      Such should be an obvious thing to know from the get-go, because God was never something physical. The Christian God is what I refer to, and there cannot be two gods that represent love. There cannot be two gods that represent love, because “love”, as an emotion, cannot be something that represents division. That would make sense, even from an Atheist’s perspective.

      Love creates unification between people, so that division becomes a oneness.

      What we see, in today’s world, is a very intense focus on the self. We reject criticism, and harshly speak out against anyone who “judges” another, by their difference. Yet, if Christianity wishes to state that God is creator, and here we are to state that we should not judge another person, then I can only understand that God would represent the artist in that scenario. That is, any artist, who is dead, and should their creations be criticized, it seems pointless. That is, I believe it to be a psychological reaction to saying God is dead, so therefore the creations of God cannot be criticized or judged.

      Love is a judgement, as I see it. It names the weakness, points it out, and the weakened one trusts the loving one to take care of them.

      But, when we focus on ourselves, I believe we focus on change. We are digging into our past, in today’s time, so that transformation is what we want, not improvement. That is to say that we do not focus on the love that relates to improvement, though will focus on regression into a “Hell” or a darkness, and we will focus on endless transformations. Transformations relate to change. They relate to chaos, dissatisfaction, and hatred.

      We spread seeds everywhere, like a dandelion, and from each of those seeds, there is a beginning. There is a new growth, there is new pain, and there is never an ending to it.

      What we feel, through strength, is when we are past a beginning, or past a pain, because we know we weren’t the only one to walk that same road. That is to say that the only ending in this world, is an ending to pain. Yet, these people who want to see their past, want to see the pain and confusion that a past relates to.

      Their only “identity” IS confusion, as far as I can tell.

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